The Gift Of Inspiration

To be inspired..... to create....... so then to inspire another. There's this joy in art, a feeling of life that's tangible. You can feel it when you see or touch something beautiful and even, if you are quiet and listen, can sense the heartbeat of the hands that made it. Art is love manifest to be shared from one to another.

My story with art and crafting is a long one so if you dare pull up a chair, get comfy and sit a while. Its been love-hate..... tumultuous times, joyful at others, but constant. I call it "consistently creating", this always and forever dabbling in every medium I can get my hands on. I cant, never could, seem to stick with one thing for long, and how could I? The whole wide world is a beautiful art buffet just waiting for one to dip there fingers in and get sticky with its sweetness. Knitting. Beading. Photography. Writing. Painting. Drawing. Sewing. Jewelry making. Candle making. Needle point. Baking. Cooking. Loving. Crocheting.

Back track 40 years.... I was born to some slightly unsavory questionable characters who although tried at times I'm sure to get it together never seemed to and I was adopted out at the age of three. Up until that time I was mostly with my mother (my father in and out of jail) who was a heroin addict and bouncing from here to there, no stable home to speak of except the times I spent with my aunt and uncle. At one point being homeless my mom and me were taken in at a commune where my aunt Joy was living and who by that time in the 70's had taken to the counter culture hippie style living. There was naked gardening, art, farming and no plumbing save for an out house and a type of solar shower. From what I've heard I loved it there. I loved my aunt Joy, they say more than my mother. But even free lovin' hippies have requirements and standards. One of the rules to live free walking in nothing more than your smile through the cabbages and carrots was absolutely no "hard" drugs. Only drugs that were seen by the community to open the mind to art and spirituality were acceptable. Drugs like LSD, Peyote and Marijuana were ok in their book, even encouraged for growth and mind expansion (lol, I know tisk, tisk but don't hate..... this was the flower child era after all) but drugs that hooked you, drug you down, changed your character for the worse were considered off limits. Not good for the group as a whole, so not tolerated for the individual. My mother being an addict tried and failed to stick by this one simple rule. They busted her banging up heroin in the outhouse and we were asked to leave. So ended my adventures with the free love movement and my young minds uninhibited artistic expansion.....at least for a while.

I was adopted by my aunt and uncle. They had two boys of their own and wanted a baby girl so very much. My father was a blue collar worker, Minneapolis fire fighter, and my mother a white collar corporate worker. I was raised in the country in (at that time) a very small wee lil town. My life had changed in a blink of an eye. Beautiful home, clothes, private school, toys..... and love. And still, I wasn't easy to deal with. I could say I regret all the pain I caused my new parents and it would be true, yet it would also be true and fair to say I honestly at that point couldn't help it. I had no channel for the confusion, dysfunction, abandonment, self condemnation, yearning, the anger. I spewed my emotional vomit it out all over them. I had gone from the daughter of a drug store robbing junkie to being the daughter of Ward and June Cleaver, complete with Wally and the Beaver.....where did I fit in?

My new mom was a completely great mixture of Martha Stewart and Mary Tyler More. She kept an impeccable home, she worked a full time job, she loved my father passionately. She was everything I wanted to be and rejected all at once. I was 38 years old before I would realize I just needed to love her and accept her and more importantly in doing this fully learn to love and accept myself.

I grew up watching her craft. She would sit nights after a day at the office curled up with yarn on the sofa giggling at shows like Moonlighting and Threes Company. Or on other nights I would hear the start and stop whirring of her Singer as she sewed me some new fantabulous outfit for school the next day. She set up a craft group with the local ladies in our area.... they would gather at our house and drink coffee, talk about their hubbys and make what ever thing my mom came up with as their project that month. Pine cone wreaths and yarn owls on driftwood. Miniature boxes to hang on the wall filled with wee tiny tea pots and cups, small miniature washboards and lil balls of yarn and knitting needles. We kids wanted in on the fun so she set one up for us too. Tri-chem paints were one of our favs. We made dolls (Herman and Paulina oh how I loved them) with yarn hair and brightly painted faces and we'd swipe our fathers white tee shirts to decorate as night shirts for ourselves. I had one with the very cool Great Grape Ape. She taught me crochet....I made a very lopsided pink scarf for my dog Muffin.

As I got into my teen years I pushed harder becoming more difficult to handle and dropped most of the arts and crafts. I got married young, had four kids soon after. I began to bake and try my darnedest to be June. My marriage ended badly and that's all I have to say bout that for now but during this time I again crafted (isnt that what wives do after all?) and became more serious about it. I started quilting and selling them. I even scored the whole back page of the local paper after they had seen one of my memory quilts with all the hand beading and embroidery. I picked up the hook again and began to crochet. My mother made jewelry and so too I began. I sewed my kids clothes and costumes. I wrote through it all..... the only thing I thought was truly mine were my words.

Finances became difficult and I started a baking company when it was me and my four kidlets in a nasty run down trailer house. I had to haul water by hand most times... bathe them in a giant Rubbermaid tote in the kitchen. Scrub clothes by hand and when the sewer line became clogged ad I couldn't afford to have it fixed, well I did that by hand too. Through it all I crafted. I picked up the hook again and began to crochet. Then my whole world was rocked by him........

I met my current hubby ( love, swoon, awwww and yum!) and he was my superman. Literally. He swooped in and saved me. We have since had three more children (now the Magnificent Seven). He was loving and patient with me the whole time while I was just going through the grind. At that time emotionally I seemed to have been slammed right back to that rejected lil girl so long ago and I was jaded. I, honestly was rotten and mean to him more often than not but he hung in there. He could see what I couldn't, or didn't want to see. He could see me. Not my anxiety disorder, not my self hate, not the BS I decorated myself with. He saw me when I didn't know who that even was.

When I was right around 38 I woke up and didn't know anything. I was surrounded by all this "stuff" I thought I was supposed to do or be but really I didn't know if any of it was me. I pulled inward, dug around asked some tough questions. Did I bake because I liked it? Or because I was supposed to? Did I sew because it gave me joy? Or because that's what my mother did? Did I knit or crochet for the beauty of it? Or did I do it to gain the love of others? And so the Purge began. I resolved to find me by stripping back myself to nothing, to a shell, and then picking and choosing that which I truly loved. Those things that were really me at my core, not bits and pieces I threw in to be what I thought others wanted me to be. Get ready, this is gonna sound harsh, crazy or maybe both......

The Purge: I burned all my fabric. I threw out hundreds of dollars in crochet hooks and knitting needles. Burned all my pattern books. Melted all my candle making goodies. My sewing machine went to the dump (in my own defense it was on its last legs). I burned all works in progress and those that were finished waiting for sale. I saved what only was of interest to my kids and passed those things on to them. And then I sat emotionally naked for a year, struggling to find myself. Until one day I woke up. I wanted to crochet. Off hubby drove me to the store and I struggled in the yarn isle looking at all that fiber for an hour. We left with nothing, and me weeping at my inability to make a decision. This happened twice more. And then I made a baby blanket.....and never stopped. :)

Today I've filled myself back up, but only with those things that deserve my internal space. My Loves firstly being my hubby and wee ones. I found that I love to crochet. I love to sew. I love to knit. I love to write. I adore photography. I'm not fond of jewelry making. I'm not hip on beading. I have to be in the mood to quilt or do needle work. Art and beauty have both played a major role in my life. I have made my living at it. I have  both crushed my spirit with it and built myself back up by crafting my own foundation. I have used art to treat my anxiety. It has opened hearts and sparked minds. I have built entire relationships with yarn as the glue. I have found money and lost myself in its pursuit only to finally find the truth in giving away my art in order to set myself free. The thing I learned is this: Im not my mom, either of them, and that's ok. I don't have to be one or the other....neither a tragic mess or perfectly perfect. Life isn't black or white. Its art. Its color. Its texture. It light and shadow. Its sound and silence. I finally just realized what my husband has seen and loved all along.... I just gotta be me. After all, we are our own life long master pieces....getting there one brush stroke, one stitch, one word, one song, one picture at a time.

Craft on............. <3

 

TRINITY STITCH SLOUCH HAT GIVE AWAY

 

*****Go here, to Strings and Things and click ON THE GVEAWAY PHOTO to leave your inspirational crafting story in the comments for a chance to win the hat seen in the photo :) Cant wait to hear how you were inspired and are inspiring others with your craft!

 

Doesn't have to be just crochet....can be any art <3

 

 

The Trinity Stitch Slouch Hat ~ FREE PATTERN

Trinity Stitch Slouch Hat

Materials Needed:

*1 Skein worsted weight yarn (I use I Love This Yarn! By Hobby Lobby)

*K(6.5) hook and an I(5.5) hook

*Yarn needles for weaving in ends

*scissors

*A smile

Stitch Explanation:

Sc: Single crochet

Ts: Trinity stitch as follows...chain 1, insert hook into same stitch and pull up a loop, insert hook into next stitch and pull up a loop x2, yarn over and pull through all 4 loops on the hook

Lets dive in! :)

Leaving a long tail, with your I hook chain 9

Row 1: Sc in 2nd chain from the hook and all the way across, chain 1, turn (8 sc total)

Row 2: Sc in the back loops only across the row, chain 1, turn (8 sc total)

Repeat row 2 for 64 more rows (total of 66 ribbed crochet rows)

*When I turn the row I don't go into the first stitch from the hook, I go in the second like the picture at the left.

 

 

 

At the end of the row, I go into those two lil side stitches there. I find that doing this method gives the band a neater finished edge.

 

When the band is at 66 sc ribbed rows chain 1 (this counts as the first stitch across the band) and turn on its side. Working in the length of the band across the tops of the rows, sc in each until you come to the last row.

Fold the band around to form a circle, being careful not to twist the band and insert hook as if to single chain going through the last stitch on the band and the FIRST stitch at the same time, yarn over as if to simply sc and pull through both spaces joining the band together.

Smile :) The band is complete..... Let's move on to the body of the slouchy.

Body: Switch to the K hook
Round 1: Chain 1, trinity stitch using the next 3 stitches.....and in each stitch around. (according to the pictures and written special stitch instruction at the beginning of the pattern)






*here you can see the hook goes in 3 separate sc, drawing up a loop at each.

*yarn over, draw through all 4 loops on hook.













*chain 1 and your trinity stitch is complete

Continue in the round, joining and working your trinity stitch back to the beginning of the sc in the first round. Begin round 2 trinity in this sc stitch. Continue working in the round until piece measures 10 inches from bottom of band to the top.

 

 

*Hint: the cluster of the previous rows trinity stitch is where the second loop is pulled up for the round above it. This way they all stay aligned....

Decreasing the hat:

When you reach ten inches (or desired length) begin to decrease the trinity stitch 4 stitches at a time. Do four normal trinities, then work a decrease as follows: Begin stitch as normal going into stitch just worked, skip next two stitches and go into 3^rdst (this will be the top of a trinity cluster)and continue to work the stitch as normal pulling up a loop, inserting into the next stitch and pulling up a loop, yarn over and pull through all 4 loops, chain 1. Continue with 4 normal trinities, one decrease trinity stitch until you have roughly 35 or so chain spaces left , or about a palm sized opening left in the top of the hat. Sc in each stitch around, fasten off with an 8 inch tail for closing the hole.

Weave in and out of the sc in the top of the hat with your yarn needle, draw up tight with needle on the inside of the hat and tie off snugly weaving in end.

Use long tail left on the band of the hat to join the seam from the inside of the hat. Tie off snugly, weave in ends.

There you have your super fun new slouchy <3

Any questions please let me know as I am new to writing patterns. You can find me here at Strings and Things on Facebook. Id love to be helpful in any way I can :) Have a beautiful day, and in all things....love.

P.S. This is a quickie after thought shot just so you could see that hat better as per request in the comments. I usually use my older daughter as my model but she has been literally gone on the go with her own things these last 24 hours. In my attempt to get the pattern out quickly, as there was a lot of interest, I only had the one shot of me wearing it...as you can imagine its kinda hard to capture the "slouch" part of the hat by myself :P Excuse the color :) Meet Ouriyonna, my wee one stepping in for her older sister to save the night, sporting the hat.

*Flash is not a photogs friend, but this is the best I could do with no light to give you a better picture of the full hat*....
 



Magic, Crochet and The Girl

  Shes always had this smile...since the day she first could. Its an uncommon sort of bright that makes you grin too in spite of yourself, simply because. My oldest daughter came into this world in three or so pushes, nice and easy as far as the business of being born goes....an uneventful pregnancy they would call it. Life changing I would say. Desperately wanted, so needed and much loved. She is my first girl of seven kidlets. Shes my right hand man, my second in command...the little mother.

Youd never know by looking at her, never know by the musical sound of her laughter or her determined spirit that shes not well.

I got to spend the whole day with her yesterday laughing, talking just having fun. Well, almost the whole day. The first half was spent at the hospital getting yet another set of scans complete, a high contrast MRI this time...stuck with more needles yet she was still smilin'. Whats wrong with her??? That's the $64,000 question isn't it? I wish I knew....wish they knew.... Falling. Headaches. Twitches. Confusion. Loss of her sense of smell/taste. Female issues. Fatigue. Extreme bloating. Vomiting. Vision difficulty. And so on and so on and so on........ and still SHE SMILEeeeeEEEes :)

Im gonna brag on her for a second so just bare with me :P That girl right there playin in the leaves? Shes my alien baby....why, you ask? Well, truth be told she just couldn't have come from me. Some bigger, brighter life form from some far off shining star for some reason unknown decided to drop her off on loan.... to me of all people...to teach, Im sure. Cuz oh my is this girl full of lessons.

At 15 shes got years of life under her belt that 30 year olds would struggle with. She can cloth diaper a bebe` near blindfolded, run a household as smooth as silk and with the type of grace a grown woman would wrestle to muster up. She is a National Honor Society member. Shes known in town as "The Valedictorian Girl". She plays the flute, the saxophone, the drums, the clarinet and just started to strum her new Fender. Shes a compulsive serial volunteer. Shes the youngest employee at our local ice cream joint (that usually has a waiting list for hire). She sings. She writes. Shes beautiful and hasn't a clue. Shes generous. She loves children and they love her. She is responsible. Shes a great friend. Shes a great student. Shes self motivated. She can cook, sew, bead, crochet, knit, embroider. Shes a blossoming photographer with a great eye.

She can forgive. She is humble.

SHE. IS. MAGIC.

After our trip to be poked and prodded we had the whole wonderful fall day to ourselves. One of the things weve always shared is a passion of photography. Shes most often been the one patiently in front of the camera waiting for me to finish playing with her like a dress up doll but lately shes been behind the lens too. So off we went to find "the perfect shots". We drove around and found a few lil places we thought were cool until yuck n yack after some unfruitful pics we discovered our minds eyes were wayyyy better than what we were getting. We came home. And home seems to always be exactly where the magic happens. I grabbed some crochet, dressed up my dolly *oops, daughter :P* and away we went. Clicking. Giggling. Acting like girls. Creating.

She even gave me some serious faces....which can be hard for such a giggly butt...

Ok, maybe shes not exactly serious....

and maybe even she just had to turn around....

But still.....

I had a scarf {pattern here} that I wanted *needed* her to wear, cuz well she just simply rocks it like that. So we stepped out onto the dirt road in front of our house to see what we could see and..... wow......did

I. EVER. SEE.

BEAUTY.

And POWER.

and JOY.

It all came together to create magic. In the background shot here, the grey cloudy sky opened up with a  sliver of sunshine....right on her....and she looked up....and she stole my breath....again.

In the end though despite the doctors or the clouds, or the camera or the crochet it all came right back to just this...her smile...me catching my breath, savoring these times. Hearing her. Being with her and really, at the end of the day, there just isn't anything else <3